Comments on: Things Change

By: The Constructivist

The Constructivist — Mon, 21 May 2007 06:06:34 +0000

My (belated) condolences, too. I lost both pairs of grandparents in the 1990s, my dad's dad as I was finishing dissertation. Thinking about the generations since theirs, it's apparent that migrations large (Poland and Hungary to the U.S.; my wife's from Japan to the U.S.; our family's back to Japan?) and small (my parents from NYC to Long Island to upstate NY; my wife's parents and grandparents from northern and southern Japan to the Tokyo area; my aunt's from Philadelphia to central NY; my own from central to western NY; my brother's from central NY to CT; my wife's sister's from the Tokyo area to Okinawa) have had a profound impact on the meaning and experience of family just within 4 generations. I don't know most of my downstate cousins; my children only see their cousins once or twice a year each; the question of where parents will retire to is looming; and so on. My image of Fukuoka was that it's like the rest of Japan, a relatively settled place with less out-migration than, say, rural China, but more than half the people my wife talks to have family members in other countries. It seems to me that the increased speed and lowered cost of travel and communication offer some cushioning, but not that much. My one big suggestion would be nations agreeing to structures of dual or even multiple citizenship. As it stands now, my girls have to decide by the time they turn 21 if they're going to be Japanese or American citizens....

By: Scott Lemieux

Scott Lemieux — Thu, 17 May 2007 14:14:38 +0000

Sincerest condolences.

By: ikl

ikl — Wed, 16 May 2007 06:53:18 +0000

My condolences

By: CMarko

CMarko — Mon, 14 May 2007 19:10:30 +0000

My sympathies as well to you and your family.

By: Gavin Weaire

Gavin Weaire — Mon, 14 May 2007 15:29:04 +0000

Let me offer my sympathies as well.

By: withywindle

withywindle — Mon, 14 May 2007 14:51:04 +0000

And deepest sympathies for your loss. Beg pardon, I should have said that first.

By: withywindle

withywindle — Mon, 14 May 2007 14:50:21 +0000

And sometimes we’re lost in time as well. My aunt, with increasing Alzheimer’s, wants to return from Boston to San Bernardino, California–but the San Bernardino of a quarter-century ago, half-a-century ago, where her parents are still alive.

No, no good solutions, I fear.

Although to add an analytical note: when I took Marj Murphy’s seminar fifteen years ago, I read an article saying that geographical mobility nowadays is more the professional classes than the working classes, as opposed to the reverse a century ago; this would imply that separation from elderly relatives affects the professional classes at a higher rate. No clue if true, but thought I’d throw it out as a speculation.

By: dorothy

dorothy — Mon, 14 May 2007 07:58:35 +0000

Hi I am an orient girl who is traditional on relative topic. We Chinese people always think you westerners have complete medical system and social insurance welfare that young generation don’t have to be on olds’ bedside at final period. This is also what the soap shows told us. Now I know that you also have your own consideration of deathwatch from relatives. You’re having a good blog.